When you stop through the kitchen and grab a snack from the jar, she comes running in shouting, "My cookie!"
You're sitting on the couch, relaxing, and watching some TV. You reach for a glass to take a drink of water and hear, "My water!"
Squeaker is playing in the bumbo and her random hand flailing leads to her touching the stuffed lamb,"No! That's mine! My Lovie!"
So our cell phone plan is up for renewal/upgrade and has been for about two months. The last time this happened, my glorious Mommy blessed me with the greatest of gifts that is the beautiful piece of technology that brought my dark and dreary life out from the shadows and into the sun.
And there was much rejoicing
Yes, I carried in my pocket more technology than NASA used to put a man on the moon.
Now this phone has been very good to me for the past two years. Has entertained me on jogs with music, has distracted me from work with App Games, and has let me play on the internet while stopped at red lights. I got it when they still offered unlimited internet, and have kept that data plan ever since, pleased with my being grandfathered in to being able to screw the system if I so chose.
Now because there was only one data plan available at this time, Husband instead chose to replace his phone with something more modest and without an internet option. You wouldn't really know because he kept stealing mine any time we were out together.
After a long two years, my phone is still great. I invested in the Invisible Shield, so my screen is still perfect. I have one speaker that is a little wonky, but I usually use headphones to listen to music, so it's livable. And I've kept up with updates, so I'm pretty pleased with how it operates. Husband's phone looks like shit is not as nice as mine.
Over the radio, I keep hearing adds from AT&T saying you can get the IPhone 3GS, which is the same model I have, for $50 with a renewal or new contract. We also take a good hard look at my internet usage and see that I can step down to a smaller plan for about half the cost and most likely not notice it. Sweet right?
Husband gets a new phone. We both have internet. We spend about the same per month. And all this is the low cost of only $50. Everybody wins right?
So we go to the AT&T store, and the trouble starts almost immediately. Husband walks in and makes a joke about going and watching basketball on the TV that is playing on the far side of the store. Booger starts running crazy around the store. So I am responsible for updating Husband's phone by myself and still end up wrangling Booger from her destructive tendencies.
Then Phone Guy starts showing me the new phone. It is the same phone as mine, but different.
It has a video camera.
It has voice recognition.
You can change the background screen instead of just the welcome/lock screen.
And I morphed from a reasonable, adult, mother of two into this:
My Preciousssss!
About this time, Husband has disappeared from the small sales floor, and Phone Guy asks if I want to download my information on the new phone and Husband's on my phone. The serpent had offered the apple. I instantly start thinking of all the arguing points as to why this is a wonderful idea. But when Husband returns, I later learned that he made an emergency trip to the potty with Booger to avoid further humiliation, he is not as impressed with this idea as I am.
I have no defense for the way I felt/acted after this point. I admit fully that I was being quite unreasonable with my frustration. But quite frankly, I did not give a fuck.
I WANTED THE VIDEO CAMERA!
I mean seriously. I've had my phone for 2 years and it's still almost perfect! I've done everything I'm supposed to! And you're too good for my phone?!
Again, logic does not prevail with blind hatrid and Gollum-like mentalities.
I then proceeded to be in a pissy-ass mood for the rest of the evening. I had become my 2-year old.
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